Late nights... and late nights

It's been a bit since my last posting - politics are still running amok but daily life has slipped back into that seductive lull of "I'll do my thing, the government will do its, and there's nothing I can do about it." Perhaps dangerous mindset, but here it is once again (hmmmm, where have we seen this before? It sounds so familiar).

Operating on the 'when it rains it pours' theory of existence, my sparsely filled days with barely any work and not much going out have morphed into a plethora of plans. I'm proud of getting to 2 films in FEST- "Le Scaphandre et le papillon" ("The Diving Bell and the Butterfly") was moving and beautiful to see. I had no idea what it was about going in, just knew that I'd be able to understand it (since French with Serbian subtitles I can handle). A man has sudden stroke, wakes up paralyzed and still manages to write a book - incredible. Both movies I saw ("Brokeback Mountain" was the other) spoke to be trapped in a situation you can't change and how varied reactions are to that state of affairs. I ponder on those who think they are trapped when they really could find a way out; we're good at placing blame far away from ourselves. But then again, sometimes you really are stuck in a situation - then it's figuring out how you yourself can make it at least livable, right?

Got to see The Belgrade Dixieland Orchestra play earlier in the week (spreading the music of the oppressors (note the sarcasm) for a Day of Jazz celebration; good tunes. Ate guacamole and played Scrabble, had really good Saturday classes and dinner with a new friend, went to Chinatown market... generally a good weekend and preparation for what will be a busy week as I cover adult classes.

Also looks like I should be working with American Councils for their summer pre-departure orientation for high schoolers going to spend a year in host families in the US; it would mean going to Ukraine for a few days end of April to get trained (where I've never been), then working end of June/start of July here in Beograd before heading to Turkey... plans they keep evolving.

OH! And funny thing - the artists have been having a lot of fun with the opportunities for satiric art current affairs have created. Here are some of my favorites based on actual posters (more here):

Sunday, sunny Sunday

So the travel alert I mentioned earlier has turned into a travel warning. The US embassy took out non-necessary personnel and dependents. But there's no need to panic - so stop panicking! Seems to be a bit more overcautious than needed, also sends political message? Again, my personal safety isn't in danger so I'm staying put.

Yesterday turned out to be a fine one. I have a new student starting next weekend, meeting with another one tomorrow (huzzah), so work appears to be picking up (knock wood). Had an excellent evening at Casa Garica with sangria and a good group of people - it was funny when Miha came because we had the Slovene, the American, and a crew of Serbs. Later on met some Brazilians... oh, the international mixing. Lots of laughter, decompressing and silliness in Serbian and English. One of my favorites was when Miha prepared to tell a joke saying it was funny in Czech, Serbian, Slovene, but not English - which was why he was telling it in English? Wordplay is a good time...

Today talked with the girls who live next door - I really like their family - as we sat on the terrace in the last of the sun and warmth of the day. It was an unexpected language lesson as we went from work/school doings to their reactions to the protests, news coverage, why Kosovo is Serbia. They pretty much felt that idiots shouldn't be destroying stuff and that it was a pity even more since all the protest/rally doings were peaceful. They'd gone down by the Parliament and said they couldn't move it was so crowded.

I find myself with not much more to say - been a quiet day, everything seems normal and that feels extremely good. You can only live with constant tension for so long after all. I'm supposed to go meet a friend here soon, so I'll post later when have more to say.

Why not legged force? Or charming force?

I've decided that in an attempt to balance out the media that keeps focusing on negative actions, let's look at some more positive things. Like the fact that most of the protests were peaceful last night, tons of people DIDN'T burn things or destroy anything.

Today walking down the street saw little kids going to or from school on their own. Things are mostly peaceful, it was a gorgeous sunny day. I'm amused by the "Serbia is Kosovo" signs in most shop windows - suspect that some of them might be there as accident insurance (which if that's the case it worked). I'll put out there too that no one is attacking people in the streets; the hooligans are going after police and buildings. I feel a strange echo of my words during the Paris car burnings/riots - I'm still not a police officer OR a building. So I'll be alright.

Meanwhile I'll keep making jokes about being "zlo" (evil); perhaps they're tasteless but gotta keep laughing. Thanks to those who have been checking in to see if I'm ok - I'm resisting the potential existential crisis of the question "Are you ok?" (Because then I start wondering "Am I ok?"). I am and have lots of class tomorrow, meeting with a new student, and then going for drinks with a motley crew (ok, my crews are always motley, but still) - life continues as normal. And that's important

Still safe...

As CNN and the rest of the world media have announced, a body was found in the US embassy (although it's not an embassy member). The news keeps replaying the same coverage, I've been getting calls and texts and emails/chats all evening as folks make sure I'm ok, both locally and in US. One pointed out that only "the greatest enemies of Serbia" could have planned such measures with the embassy attacks (rioters went after Croatian, British and some others). He has a point - none of this is helping Serbians or anyone else for that matter, at least that I can see. There's even a travel alert now for Serbia.

But I'm home. I'm safe. And I have yummy banana bread to munch on.

I'm still confused about why Kosovo invokes so much emotion, is so important. Been told it's a long story but I wish that someone would just tell it already. Although I think that I need to get some sleep before that happens - that's been yet one more thing that's hard to come by here recently. But tomorrow, as always, is another day.

Burning...

US Embassy was breached. Twitter is a decent blog, although take a grain of salt and verify things. Also Belgrade 2.0, (although not updating). Saw images of fire (like this one above), it's now been picked up by CNN and others.

The crowds were big (200-300,000) at the protest, pretty calm although some instances of kids throwing things, burning trash cans, etc. in side streets. There was rally at Parliament at 5 (photo), then service at St. Sava at 7 - things were quiet there, peaceful and beautiful in a way with candles and folks of all ages gathering. Someone said today that Serbia needs to mourn its loss of Kosovo - I'm fine with mourning but not destructive pyres.

Going to make banana bread. Watch the news some more. Was told this afternoon that there's no reason that I should need to leave in a hurry. Here's hoping that still holds tomorrow.

Spy alliance for life!

Nothing much new to report to be perfectly honest. There's tension in the air like I've never felt before; everyone is waiting, waiting. Life is moving on, yet on hold. Friends are becoming more paranoid, the question everyone is asking is "what will happen?"

And no one seems to know.

Yesterday I didn't have any classes - this week I'm not working very much due to cancellations and these potential new students playing the waiting game before starting anything new. It timed out well because I could meet with Anne-Sophie, a lovely française I met in December who has been traveling around the region for almost 6 months now. I could once more speak in French (yay!) and drink fabulous hot chocolate as well as talk about the difficulties with transitioning home after travels, the constant pressures of being foreign, becoming an "other" at home and away, ideas about the future, and compare the US, France, Serbia, and other Balkan countries. After my English reading circle (I do like those lit discussions) I met up with some fellow crazy Americans, Anne-Sophie came too and we toasted Lafayette, were silly and serious at turns. Did everyone good I think - with all this pressure you have to be silly otherwise you'll crack. It was a good night with a motley crew assembled by the end laughing like mad.

Today I had two classes, ran some errands, saw other friends for drinks in the evening. We finished up with Anne-Sophie, Nicholas and I walking homewards discussing (in French naturally) how everyone assumes that we're spies. I mean, I've stopped fighting it. And when the French conspiracy to overthrow everything so that Sarkozy can manage his marital woes and make everyone eat snails daily comes to light, well, you'll know where you heard it first. And that classy dame on his arm? Well, let's just say I met her in Belgrade in the wee smalls of a December evening...

Seriously, the big protest tomorrow will be a (if not the) turning point. Nicholas (who sticks out a bit being a tall black man from Congo even though he claims to be Montenegrin) said that the way people look at him has changed for the worse as the week has gone on. He's used to being stared at but it's become more pointed. A policeman stopped him today and told him not to go out tomorrow for his own sake (rioters don't check ID before beating you after all). Tense. Things are supposed to be peaceful, but who knows what will actually happen. I'll be going nowhere near the center but watching it on TV (perhaps). I'd just like this miasma of fear to go away, is that too much to ask?

Kosovo recognition: Afghanistan first, France, U.S. follow

This is a real headline from B92. Sounds like the US and France said, "Hey, if Afghanistan is doing it, well, we should too! Then we'll be super cool. Like they are!" The comments are great on the article as well, worth reading.

So it was my first day out in a few - felt good to be outside my four walls. The city seemed full of its normal kind of busyness with people everywhere, although there were more police out and about, directing traffic and being present in front of public buildings. Plans are being made for protests, the government is heading up one Thursday and there is talk of students doing something but nothing definite. After my lesson I saw riot police (they so look like Ninja Turtles) at Zeleni Vrenac (a market and big bus stop), some vandal youth shouting at each other. The McD's there was already trashed as well; Mercator (a Slovene owner supermarket) was evacuated this afternoon because of bomb threat (they had a little explosion earlier this week when the store was empty). Most of the destruction has been done by this kind of crowd - teens who are bored and see a good excuse to break some stuff. Why not?

Heard stories from other friends about October 5th revolution and how organizers during that time would change cell numbers daily, keep everyone on their call list memorized and leave no trace in their phones at all. No contact info, call history, or text messages. Now there's dedication to a cause.

Speaking of texts, got one from a friend that said "don't go protest even if you can run ;-) this is crazy country - i told you so." Taxi driver tonight told me that every country has its radicals - she's totally right. (She didn't realize either that I'm not Serbian - my "disguise" of comprehension pays off again!) It's unfortunate that they are often the ones who get media coverage. But then again, moderates don't give quite as exciting quotes or do quite such boneheaded actions. Usually.

My students keep canceling lessons as well - who knows what's connected to what.

I just want someone to give me a good reason or two that Serbia would actually want to keep Kosovo - in many ways they're better off without it. By the same token, I wonder how those in Kosovo will really benefit from being independent. Infrastructure doesn't grow overnight.

And for all of you wondering out there - I've packed away my American flag cape since this is obviously not the time to be wearing it on the streets. Which are quiet, safe, and FULL of police. I'll update more frequently this week as I rocket around and see what I can find out (without, of course, putting myself in danger).

Riots

Yes, there were riots at the US Embassy today in Belgrade. Also Slovenian Embassy. There's some video here. Also here is B92 coverage.

I've learned also that I'm a bringer of evil. That's what some of them say on the news - my Serbian has definitely improved.

Perhaps on a slightly irreverent note, I must add that today my cumin lost its will to live and plunged from my spice rack. Coincidence? No. Moved by its plight (as well as its own identity being in question - was it really cumin seeds after all? Or caraway?), separated from other spices by glass, perhaps also it harbored sympathies for those who also want to be apart, independent. Even if that independence means leaving via the trash bag. Sacrifice and all that.

So yes, they've stormed the McDonald's downtown. But I'm safe. And plan to continue being so. Reminds me of when I was in Paris during the riots - there I wasn't a car or police officer; here I'm not a public building so not a good target for rioting. I'll post more as I know it. But still no one seems to be really worried yet.

Oh the pain...

Some excitement here in Beograd. I hear there are tons of cops outside the US Embassy but no protesters. Kosovo is talking about "sticking to its agenda" (whatever that means exactly), I'm watching my news sources but everyone I've talked to expects it to stay a governmental, non-violent affair. Whew. Our recent warden notice (sent to registered US citizens in this fair nation) simply warned against going to public demonstrations of any sort because they could become messy. They always say that though.

We also had a low-level earthquake the other day - I'd thought it was just my neighbor doing something odd below, but no. Crazy. See, anything can happen here. No lie.

Past few days have been very quiet for me - my low back decided that it hated me on Valentine's Day (which I have no explanation for) despite my chocolate consumption. I went to a lesson anyway but could barely walk afterwards. Stayed over at Julia's and two doctors told me they didn't see anything wrong, so loaded me with painkillers and I lay on a bed of pain since I couldn't really do anything else. I did make it home the next day though (and up all those stairs) and haven't left my place since. I've had some visitors for coffee, watched some good movies, just taking it totally slow. Frustrating how my first three day weekend in months and I can't do anything on it (and I for once had what looked like a full social calendar, just to add insult to injury). Since the weather is totally freezing (could this be the reason for no protesters? Possibly.) being inside and warm isn't such a bad plan after all. Today I'm moving less like an old woman and plan to be back on my feet tomorrow no longer taking the simple miracle of locomotion for granted.

That way I can not attend protests more easily if nothing else.